keep-calm-and-carry-ativanOne of my ex’s used to tell me to try his ativan when I would get a stomach ache. It was a test to see if I was getting stomach aches because of anxiety. Unfortunately, the pill just made me tired and didn’t take away my stomach ache.

Last year, when my nerves were severely F*@ked up, I went to a psychologist to get some meds. I’m normally a very happy, positive person and I knew the person I was then wasn’t me. I wasn’t happy about getting put on antidepressants, but I knew the only way to start crawling out of the hole I dug for myself was to get some help.

My Dad and I called my psychologist Bowtie guy because he always wore a bowtie. The first time I went to him he asked me if my Dad was my boyfriend. Ewa, gross. But, I’m sure he’s seen stranger things.

Anyways, Dr. Bowtie prescribed me Ativan to help with my anxiety attacks. I was having a pretty rough time. I didn’t want to leave my bed or the basement, let alone my house. If I had to leave, say for a doctor’s appointment, I literally would need to start preparing myself HOURS in advance. I had to take a shower the night before because showers got me all worked up. I could feel perfectly fine, but once I got in the shower I’d start shaking, start breathing really heavy and get dizzy/light-headed. It was horrible. I absolutely hated it.

So many people told me to do breathing exercises, yoga, use essential oils, try this remedy or try that experiment – but the fact of the matter was I needed help. I’m not saying that meditation and breathing exercises don’t help or that there aren’t essential oils that can calm my nerves, but my sympathetic nervous system was so hyped up I needed something to help settle them down.

1302247258549_4934421I don’t think this is a drug that should be relied on for the rest of your life. I look at ativan as something that can help you manage symptoms while you work on other changes in your life that can help you long-term. For instance, I SO BADLY wanted to be able to sit there, take deep breaths and feel better, but my body just would not allow me to calm down enough to do such a thing. Deep breathing exercises weren’t something I did prior to this, so I wasn’t accustomed to the activity. If you practice an act enough it can become second nature to your brain. The ativan helped calm me down and allowed me to practice deep breathing exercises. And then eventually meditation and yoga.

I didn’t have any side effects of ativan – the only thing I really noticed was if I couldn’t fall asleep, because I was super anxious and I took one, I’d have a hard time waking up the next day. I’d sleep pretty late, so I guess ativan made me tired! haha!

We all do things differently and everything doesn’t work for everyone. If you start taking a drug like ativan or xanax and don’t feel well on it – talk to your doctor. Maybe using tools, rather than medication, will work for you! I just know that in the situation I was faced with that was not the case. I truly believe that this medication helped calm me down and allowed myself to work on managing my fight or flight response in my own way.

Don’t feel shy or embarrassed asking for help.

We all need a little help sometimes.

Wishing You A Pain Free Day!

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